Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Im part way to drunk.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
