white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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