No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
