I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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