Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
