Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
May the power of my ass compel you!!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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