Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Is Oprah even human
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize