i love accidental penises.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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