i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
