I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
