This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
