Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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