I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
