He felt like a one man threesome
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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