dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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