break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
