Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober