I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Don't EVER smell your tampon
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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