He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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