talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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