I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
