..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
