He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?