sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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