Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
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Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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