ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
