So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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