So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
