I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
