Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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