i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
