): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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