Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants