chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
