Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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