You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize