i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.