I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Randomize
