Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize