North Korea, Best Korea!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
