i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
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