I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
