I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
there is glitter all over my balls
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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