So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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