i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
