accomplished twins. life is a go
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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