You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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