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franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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