If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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