the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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