i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize