maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Too much gin, very little bucket
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
